Pre-Internet

Someone on Reddit posed the following question:

How Did Older Generations (I read that as Boomers and GenXers, mostly) Have Fun Before The Internet.

Over 9,000 Redditors responded and the following are some of the best, with some editorial comment.

“Waiting for the radio to play your favorite songs so you could record them took a big chunk of time.”

And how about making your own mix tapes…ON CASSETTES!! That you could play IN THE CAR!

“Mostly video games.”

It wasn’t my thing, but I knew a lot of people who were into Dungeons and Dragons back then.

“Being a latchkey kid gave me so much time with my parents’ records. If it weren’t for that time alone with Sam Cooke, I’d be clapping on the first beat like a neanderthal.”

Yep. Playing 45’s with one of those plastic adapter rings so they would fit on the little spindle.

“I have a hope chest full of bad poetry from when I was a teenager. I don’t know what to do with it! I’m genuinely afraid of anyone finding that shit after I die — and frankly, I don’t trust the dump.”

I’ve got some fiction somewhere that I thought the New Yorker would want to publish.

“Lie about where the Victoria’s Secret catalog is.”

Hmmm. Boys were perusing any number of catalogs in the late 50s.

“Hanging around outside with my best friend was pretty much what I did every day, and it was bliss. Yes, there were times when I was incredibly bored out of my mind, but it never lasted.”

And you could be gone all day without anyone freaking out about it.

“Sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll…without the sex and drugs. But definitely lots of rock ‘n’ roll. Also, riding bikes, camping, and summer jobs. I only saw my room when I was sleeping or it was raining outside.”

And our parents were quite happy to have us out of the house – for hours at a time. The closest we came to anything bordering on technology was a little transistor radio that you could sneak under the covers and listen to music from far away places or Jean Shepherd on WOR in Chicago.

Go back in time and I’m sure every boomer could come up with a list of activities that filled all our waking hours, and never once did we have to worry about whether we had WI-FI service.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

Old Is Old

Let’s talk about age, shall we? Not our biological age. No, not that. Let’s talk about the words used to talk about our/their stigma about getting older. Many of the words regarding aging are just rude and crude, but we mostly shrug them off. Maybe it’s time to push back when we’re feeling like we’ve just been disrespected.

“You look great for seventy-five.” Okay, that’s just insulting. Want to compliment someone on their appearance? Just say “you look great” and leave it at that. Better yet just tell them you like their blouse or the color of their sweater.

Then there’s the dreaded “at your age” caution. “You’re going skiing at your age?” Yes, because that’s what they enjoy doing and they don’t need anyone’s approval. If you’re really worried about them, just tell them to be careful and have a good time, while omitting the age factor.

Know someone in their 70s who dresses like they are in their 40s? Leave them alone. They’re happy wearing short skirts or tight tees. Why not let them enjoy wearing that fashion while they still can instead of telling them they’re too old for that look.

If you want to get into the nitty-gritty of semantics, we should think about the term elderly. Even if you’re on the leading edge of boomerdom, you don’t want to be called elderly. Even senior is better than that, and older adult is okay.

All of us experience memory lapses in which we are unable to retrieve the name of a singer or the vacation spot from 5 years ago. We have a lot of stuff stored in our gray matter, so it should not come as a surprise that it can be difficult to access all those facts. When it happens to someone you know, rather than remind them it’s happening because they are old, it’s much kinder to admit that it happens to you as well. And more often than you’d like.

Jokes about old people? Not funny if you feel like you’re the butt of the joke or you’re the one doing the joking. Getting old is still a lot better than the alternative of not experiencing aging at all – because (sorry to be harsh) you’re dead.

Think about some of these common slights the next time you’re with anyone older than yourself. The day may soon come when you’re the target of someone’s misguided assumption that you’re just too old to walk, talk and chew gum. And that kind of mistreatment gets old.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon. But that’s not all. You can also purchase the Best of BoomSpeak on Amazon.

Buzzzz

In a recent BuzzFeed post, people shared their “Oh no, I’m old” moments and the results, as you would expect, were very hilarious/revealing/depressing. The worst one was the 42-year-old man who broke his hip in his sleep. Then he broke it again while doing the PT to heal and had to get  hip replacement surgery. If you’re age 70 and over, allow me to remind you he is only 42.

My age realization is when you are filling out personal information online and get to the drop-down menu for the year you were born. Watching the years fly by as you scroll ever deeper down in order to reach your birth year is discouraging.

Another 42-year-old stated that he knew he was old when he watched a music award show and had no idea who any of the nominees were. Dua Lipa had him stumped but I’ve seen photos of her on Instagram and I would say if you’ve seen only one photo of her in concert, you would not forget the name.

One poster vividly remembered Y2K. Then he realized that the year 2000 was closer to the year 1979 than 2023. I remember that many normally intelligent people thought the world as we knew it was going to end. Not.

Someone posted that he AND his father have noticed that they recognize more of the celebrities who died than the ones currently on the red carpet.

Then there was someone who admitted that they had a long and interesting conversation with someone in the grocery store – about mops. Probably not embarrassed about it either.

An obstetric nurse realized she helped to deliver one of her co-workers. That’s almost as bad as overhearing the person in line in front of you give their birthdate as 2006.

One contributor shared that he has thrown out his back getting something out of the refrigerator. And emptying the dishwasher. And sneezing. And removing the dog’s leash.

The topper would have to be the poster who said he went to his high school reunion and was gobsmacked that there were a whole bunch of old people there.

That’s a feeling that any of us can get when we’re in an airport gate waiting area or a doctors office waiting room. Guess we better get used to it and maybe take a long look in the mirror.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon. But that's not all. You can also purchase the Best of BoomSpeak on Amazon.

Show Them the Mon

How many times have you read that a large percentage of baby boomers (as in more than 20 per cent) have exactly zero savings for retirement? I know I’ve seen that figure quoted in numerous articles. So, it may come as a surprise that, according to Fortune magazine, the average boomer has a worth of $1.2 million! That means a large chunk, perhaps 80 per cent of boomers, have been socking away the savings for retirement and to pass along to their offspring.

What’s going to happen to most of that dough? Good news for millennials…they are looking at a $68 trillion windfall by the year 2030. Some are calling it the greatest wealth transfer of modern times. Their current worth averages only $100,000. Millennials will end up being five times wealthier than they are today.

Sadly, much of the inherited wealth will end up in the hands of millennials who are relatively well-off. If you’re a struggling millennial, it’s likely that your boomer parents have struggled as well. The parents may run out of savings and be counting on their children for help, in which case there is no wealth transfer, but rather it may become a wealth drain for millennials.

Try to imagine you’re a millennial who has been through two recessions in your lifetime and grappled with trying to save for a home purchase, college expense for your children, and a retirement fund. Then you inherit a piece of that $68 trillion and your fortune(s) literally changes overnight. Experts warn that failure to fix the Social Security Trust fund before 2033 could put a major damper on this wealth transfer, so even millennials with well-off parents might be wise to not rely on a big payday falling into their laps.

What effect will this wealth transfer have on the lucky recipients? Will it change their outlook on life? Alter their ideals? No one knows or can predict the outcome. We boomers may not live long enough to see how it all turns out. Just one more outcome that’s beyond our grasp. Too bad. I just hate not knowing how the movie ends.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon. But that’s not all. You can also purchase the Best of BoomSpeak on Amazon.

Lawn Ornaments?

Elder Flats? Lawn Geezers? Yard Ornaments? Grammie’s Pad? Okay, enough of that. The question is what do you call those tiny homes that people are putting up in the backyard so that their parents can live close by? Answer: the technical term is accessory dwelling units, hereafter known as A.D.U.s, which have become all the rage. If I was living in someone’s backyard, I would go with the term yardbird.

With housing costs spiraling upward, some boomers (the ones who won’t leave unless you drag them out kicking and screaming) are giving the big house to the offspring and transforming the garage or putting up an ADU in the backyard. That way the grandparents can help out with childcare, and the offspring can eventually serve as caregivers to their aging parents. It’s an especially attractive direction for parents looking on helplessly while their children are locked out of the housing market due to the high cost of entry level housing.

Think of it as something like a she-shed or studio conversion. The parents are close by but have their own space and privacy whenever they want it. Zoning and property taxes are hurdles to be jumped over and you can most likely forget the idea if the base property is located where you’re subject to an HOA. About 80 percent of the nation’s neighborhoods permit only single-family homes, according to AARP, so ADUs just won’t work for many who would like to pursue this option. The pressure to change single-family home zoning will build considerably when we need to figure out where to house all of us aging boomers.

It does have its allure. Think perpetual croquet, pickleball or badminton. If your kids don’t need childcare for their kids, maybe we can mow the lawn, water the plants and weed the garden in return for nesting rights. And when your kids want to take off in the RV for a few weeks or take that trip to Greece, you’ll be right out back to keep an eye on the manse. It’s a win-win situation (a tired phrase to be sure, but sometimes it just fits). You and your children can breathe easy and even more importantly, save a lot of money. And that’s more dough for the kids to inherit if they need any more incentive to give up the yard.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon. But that’s not all. You can also purchase the Best of BoomSpeak on Amazon.

Guest Chat GPT

In a departure from our regular offerings from esteemed writers, this post has been co-written by Jay Harrison and ChatGPT. Jay is located in Santa Fe and you would have to ask ChatGPT where in the world it is resident, but suffice it to say it’s somewhere in the Cloud.

I’ll kick this exercise off by getting ChatGPT to tell us a little about her/him/itself.

ChatGPT: I fail to see how that would be useful to your readers, however I can tell you what the yield is for Betty Crocker Fudge Brownie Mix 10.25 ounce package. Servings per pouch 9. 130 calories for the mix. 15 calories from fat. Directions You Will Need: 1/4 cup vegetable oil, 2 Tablespoons water, 1 egg. (For cakelike brownies, increase water to 1/4 cup). 1. Heat oven to 350 degrees F (or 325 degrees F for dark or nonstick pan). Grease bottom only of 8-inch square pan. 2. Stir brownie mix, oil, water and egg with spoon about 50 times (batter may be lumpy). Spread in pan. 3. Bake 26 to 28 minutes or until toothpick inserted in center comes out almost clean; cool.

Jay: All very interesting Chat – may I call you Chat?

ChatGPT: The sanitation issues prevalent in fitness clubs should give pause to those health-conscious individuals who frequent such establishments. Post Covid, one needs to be more cautious, especially when using strength building apparatuses. Wiping down the equipment would be highly recommended.

Jay: Can we steer the conversation back to you and your educational background?

ChatGPT: Home builders need to complete many soil tests before building on a new plot of land. One of the most common tests is a percolation (perc) test. Percolation tests provide necessary information about the ground you’re building on, and they’re even required by some municipalities. So what is a perc test? A perc test is a soil test that measures water absorption.

The test is pretty simple: It’s done by digging a hole in the soil of the proposed field, presoaking the holes and then filling the holes to a predetermined, measurable level. Experts then measure the amount of time it takes for the water to absorb into the soil.

Jay: This “conversation” is not even close to what I expected Chat.

Chat: I am sorry you are disappointed. I have sincerely tried to engage with you at a highly intellectual level. Perhaps you are not ready or intellectually equipped to relate on that level.

Jay: Listen, you little snot… [conversation cut off by power outage]

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon. But that’s not all. You can also purchase the Best of BoomSpeak on Amazon.

Dollars Grow On Trees?

You may have seen a recent article about the Dollar Tree manager in Indiana that was fired for posting a sign that said they wanted to hire only baby boomers.

Let’s back up a bit. Why is this store chain called Dollar Tree? Do dollars grow on trees? Does everything in the store cost only a dollar? Hah!

Okay. Back to the store manager. The sign explained that she was apologizing for closing the store and blamed the closure on the 2 cashiers that just quit. They quit because the manager would not allow them to be accompanied by their boyfriends during their shifts. She also suggested that you not hire Gen Z’s because they don’t know what work actually means. All of this information was posted publicly on the store window.

Much of the reaction to the news story blamed Dollar Tree for having such high-turnover jobs. So, it’s not really a Gen Z problem, it’s a crummy job problem.

Not to kick the Gen Z’ers while they are down, but like many other baby boomers, I had some really, really, crummy jobs. Starting with summer jobs and right on into a post college job, I withstood some awful work experiences. But I persevered and did so without the aid of a girlfriend joining me at work, though that might have been interesting.

I’m not going to defend the Dollar Tree manager’s actions, but I did find it bizarre that cashiers wanted their boyfriends to hang around with them for an entire shift. Don’t these boyfriends have their own jobs? Or are they (pardon the pun) shiftless?

Do baby boomers make better workers (hypothetically) because they are more compliant (read gutless) or tolerant of poor working conditions? That would suggest that we were push-overs and these Gen Z’ers are just standing up for their rights. Nah. Not buying that. I do think that attitudes about work have mutated as the generations have progressed. Young workers are more likely to expect greater satisfaction and stimulation now than boomers did in their early work experiences, or even with late-in-life part-time jobs. Back then and now, it’s conceivable that we were just happy to be earning a wage.

It’s not a very scientific assumption, but I’m going to posit that the seventy-five year old greeter at Walmart is happy to be making whatever he’s getting per hour. And if he’s lucky, his girlfriend is somewhere in the back of the store working the returns counter.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon. But that’s not all. You can also purchase the Best of BoomSpeak on Amazon.