Slow News Day

Really. Dog names. The news today included a report on what names are popular with baby boomers when it comes to naming their pets. Seriously. It was in the news.

The report noted that Millennials were keen to give their pets human names such as Luna or Max. Sure enough, if you do a search for the current popular dog names of 2022, they skew towards actual people names. Luna was number one, followed by Bella, Charlie, Max, Daisy, Lucy, Cooper, Bailey, Milo, Coco, Lily, Zoe, Lola, Buddy, Sadie, Stella, Bear, Rocky, Molly, Teddy, Maggie, Penny, Duke and Leo.

Boomers, on the other hand, relied on popular culture sources such as comics, film and music.

The source of this startling news? Dog name trend reports (whatever those are) and anecdotal evidence. And there it is. The old anecdotal evidence trope. You might as well say you’re making this crap up, but okay, let’s have it. It’s a slow news day.

1. Snoopy – Really. The cartoon dog has a special place in boomers’ hearts (according to anecdotes).

2. Maggie – They give the Rod Stewart song credit for this one.

3. Dolly – Dolly Pawton. Need we say more.

4. Charlie – Because JFK had a terrier by that name.

5. Lassie – Timmy fell in the well and well, what else do you need to know?

6. Toto – Yellow brick road says it all.

7. Buddy – Because he/she truly is your best friend.

8. Major – Presidents Biden and Franklin D. Roosevelt had German Shepherds with this name.

9. Benji – The movie scores again.

10. Bear – Because your dog looks like a bear?

11. Chewy – Either the Star Wars influence or the dog is really mouthy.

12. Lady – Go back to 1955 for the Disney movie influence or just blame it on the Tramp.

13. Cujo – Who turns to Stephen King for dog name inspiration?

14. Fido – Sheesh! Does any self-respecting boomer call their dog Fido? According to anecdotal evidence, yes!

I hope this information has been useful to you, or at least entertaining. I know that I feel better informed now. At least anecdotally.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

 

Definition of Terms

Old. Is that what we are now? If you are someone born in let’s say 1947 to 1953, do you think of yourself as old? We’re talking about 70 and 75 year-olds – the leading edge of the baby boomer generation.

Wouldn’t a 75-year old tell you that old is 90? Works for me. Old is anyone, at any time, who is 15 years older than me. I don’t know what the hell I’ll do if I make it to 90, which is not improbable given that my mother lived to 106.

You could go with mature. That makes you sound level-headed at the very least. Instead of gentle yoga, you could sign up for mature yoga. There’s no fun-loving aspect to it however, and we still just want to have fun.

Deep-rooted could work but there are too many plant and tree connotations. Then there’s that whole dust to dust thing that is just plain depressing. Let’s bury that one.

Ripe sounds great even though it harkens back to puberty. Is there anything wrong with that? We’re lucky if we can even remember puberty never mine relive it as old people. Besides, it was really our awkward phase and there’s no point in repeating that when these days your main goal is not to fall over when you pull on your socks.

Long-standing has a nice ring to it, but as I write this, I’m at one of those stand-up desks and I would really like to lower it about now and take a seat. Being upright for long periods of time is not as much fun as it used to be. But better than perpetually reclined (there’s a great euphemism!).

Antiquated is a non-starter for obvious reasons. At least it’s obvious to anyone who has ever been told that the true definition of an antique is something that is 100 years old or more.

You can cross off ancient on the same grounds. You may feel ancient after sitting cross-legged on the floor for 10 minutes on some project, and then trying to get your limbs to move back into something resembling standing.

Aged is my final shot at a reasonable term for baby boomers who are on their way to 80. Like cheese or fine wine, aged says you’re getting better all the time. Not as limber of body or sharp in brain power, but aging quite nicely, thank you.

Face it. We have more in common with Parmigiano-Reggiano or Gorgonzola. Brie or ricotta are long past in the rear view mirror.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

 

Solo or So Low?

About 26 million Americans 50 or over live alone. It’s now the fastest-growing demographic in this country.

There’s a lot of reasons but key among them is that women have had more opportunities for career advancement, home ownership and financial independence. So, no surprise, women make up about 60% of the total.

And many of these live-alones feel positive about their circumstances. This, despite the fact that research clearly shows that they will face worse physical and mental health outcomes, as well as shorter life spans. Many of these individuals do not have children, which raises the additional quandary of who/how will they fit into any kind of elder care scheme.

Downsizing is problematic due to a lack of smaller scale housing. Despite the surge in single-person households, builders are focused on bigger and bigger homes. So many of these live-alones are forced to live in more space than they really need or can afford.

While they may prize their solo lifestyle, many of these boomers are freaked out by the looming elder care issue. Who are they going to call when a serious illness arises or a physical limitation makes it harder to live in their larger than needed home?

The solution may lie in some type of communal living option, where live-alones can continue to have the independence of living alone, but in a supportive atmosphere that at least assures their safety and emotional well-being. The co-operative housing movement is picking up steam but will it be large enough and soon enough to meet the demand of 26 million seniors is a big question. If you know a fellow boomer who is living alone, it would not be considered rude to discuss the co-op housing with them. The future for live-alone boomers could be bleak unless we boomers pull together to look for solutions.

It’s the least we can do for each other.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

Thumbs Down?

I rarely use emojis, in part because half the time I can’t make out what they are trying to convey. And it’s not an eyesight issue. It’s more about whether that face is happy or sad or noncommittal. Are you trying to console me or mock me? Why are you sending me a pile of poop? Is that a grimace or did you get new dentures?

Sorry. I’ll get over it. But apparently Gen Z is done with some emojis and cannot understand why boomers are still using them. These are the same peeps who declared skinny jeans are over so you have to take them seriously.

According to research done with 16 to 29-year olds by Perspectus Global, there are 10 emojis that just make you look old. Thumbs up is number one on the kill list. Next is the red heart, followed by the OK fingers, check mark, poo, crying face, monkey eye cover, clapping hands, red lip kiss, and grimace face.

If you think you’re having trouble discerning emoji meanings, it turns out that 78 percent of those surveyed said they innocently used an emoji before learning that it meant something other than what they thought it did. Even they were as confused as I am.

By the way, this surveyed population indicated they used an average of 76 emojis per week. Is it so hard to just say what you mean? Why can’t we just say we’re happy to hear someone’s good news? Or sad to hear of someone’s misfortune? And I still don’t know why you would want to send someone fecal matter (new puppy?).

Twenty-two percent of the survey group indicated that they use multiple emojis in texts in order to make it clearer. Huh. Or should I say, huh? If the recipient is confused by the meaning of the inserted emoji, how does that make the text more clear?

Why am I asking you? You are most likely a baby boomer who couldn’t give 2 you-know-what’s (see…you don’t need a pile of poop). I’m glad I got that off my chest and that there is no emoji for the word chest. Is there??

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

Keep the money!

According to a national survey, 1 in 4 boomers believe that they can’t trust younger generations with an inheritance. Fine! Keep your money! Are you afraid you’re going to run out of dough and trust issues are just an excuse? Or you really think your kids are too dumb to do the right thing with the money?

Either way, it doesn’t say anything good about A) the way you handle your retirement funds or B) the way your brought up your kids.

Half of the respondents thought it was more important to enjoy life with the cash on hand than leave it behind as an inheritance. Okay, that’s more like it. Travel, play, enjoy yourselves (“it’s later than you think”) and the kids will be fine. When you’re gone, they can have the house and whatever is left in the bank and mutual funds. That’s not such a bad deal all the way around.

Is it too late to mention that close to 45 percent of Gen Xers and Millennials surveyed were confident that they would make good use of an inheritance. And why not? It’s found money. Almost like seeing a $100 bill laying on the ground. Only it’s 50, 60, or 100 thousand of them laying on the ground. Of course they will make good use of it. They could afford a nicer home, a more reliable car, better colleges for the kids and maybe a nice vacation now and then. Wouldn’t that make you happy knowing that your money can make your kids happy? No! You’re dead, remember?

Families and money. It can be a real palaver. In the end (and I mean that in the life cycle sense), all you can do is hope that whatever assets you leave behind are passed on to your progeny and they get some real pleasure out of whatever they do with that money. And if you enjoyed spending it when you were alive, all the better. Everyone’s happy. Unless you wanted to live to spend it a little longer. Can’t help you there.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

The Future

Saw a disturbing headline today. “What is the future for baby boomers?”

I think/hope they were referring to lofty subjects such as eldercare, co-op housing, workplace transitions, etc. Otherwise, you would have to infer they were talking about the fact that we are not just retiring in great numbers, but also dying in great numbers.

Sorry about going a little dark here, but if you query Google for what year most baby boomers will die, you get the following: “Projected deaths rise steadily as the baby boomers age and eventually die, then plateau around 2045. By 2060, the tail end of the baby boom will be 95 or older.”

If the first thing you do upon seeing that statement is subtract 2022 from 2045, you are not alone. Let’s see…that’s 23 years from now. Twenty-three more years to live, breathe, travel, enjoy good food and fine wine, maybe visit places you’ve always wanted to see, finish reading the books you started but never completed, enjoy the companionship of one special friend (along with the other great friends and family in your life), play pickleball if still able, and the list could go on and on. I’ll let you make your own list.

But the picture is not all rosy. Life expectancies for boomers are improving all the time, but about 2.6 million boomers die each year. By 2050, that number will be 4 million each year. Whoosh! That’s the sound of positive thoughts now hurriedly escaping from your brain.

The point however, if there is one, is if we can just hang on in reasonably good health, there’s still a lot of time to enjoy life. The good health aspect is a major caveat. If you’re not taking good care of yourself, aren’t you just cheating yourself out of that 23-year package? That’s just a little nudge to get you out there walking and exercising. And flossing! Don’t forget flossing. No one really wants to travel to exotic places without their own teeth.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

Crime Is Still Paying

The good news is that crime is going down. No, really. It’s been going down for the last 20 years. The arrest rate has gone down a third in that time.

As you would expect, most crimes are committed by younger, more agile folks. People who can jump over fences after a burglary, or outrun police after robbing someone at an ATM. But here’s the kicker. Crime among young people is decreasing at the same time that baby boomer crime is INCREASING. For adults aged 55 and older, there has been a twenty per cent increase. One way to read that statistic is that these boomers engaged in criminal activity when they were younger, and they are still at it. What the hell? Once a crook, always a crook, as someone close to me pointed out. She also mentioned a former President.

Other than fomenting insurrection, what sort of crimes are boomers committing? Like many other age groups, the crimes fall into the 4 major categories: murder/non-negligent manslaughter, robbery, rape, and aggravated assault.

If this is starting to worry you as much as it does me, we’re not alone. Think about the Gen Z kid who’s worried that Grandpa is cooking up a jewel heist or murdering his former business partner who ratted him out to the Feds for money laundering.

We are supposed to be retiring, moving to the Sunbelt and playing shuffleboard, not murdering anyone. What happened to the Summer of Love? That was 1967 in San Francisco. Timothy Leary told the hippie crowd to “turn on, tune in, drop out.” And many did just that. Unfortunately, many others followed the path of crime and now it’s clear that they are still on that path. Politicians alone must be responsible for a large chunk of boomer crime. Insider trading, misuse of government funds, misuse of campaign funds, bribery, perjury, tax evasion – the possibilities are endless.

If you are reading this and have committed a crime lately, my plea to you is “knock it off.” You’re making boomers look bad and we’ve done a fine job doing that without you adding to our bad reputation.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

All Hail the 70'

It’s official. The 70s are going to be the best time of your life. Even if AARP didn’t come out with a recent survey that indicated people in their 70s were the happiest, I myself was feeling pretty darn happy, just so you know.

You can click the link for the AARP/National Geographic “Second Half of Life Study, but the bottom line is that people in their 70s are in one description, “doggedly optimistic” about their life and the future. Keep in mind, these people were interviewed post-COVID and they are still thinking positively about their lives and what’s ahead. Thirty-four percent of adults 80-plus and 27% of those in their 70s report they are “very happy,” compared to 21% of those 60 to 69, 18% of those 50 to 59 and 16% of those 40 to 49. According to the survey: 90% of respondents in their 70s said they were happy, compared with 81% in their 60s and 80% in their 40s.

Some observers have noted people in their 70s might be referred to as Generation X, for the lack of attention that they receive. It’s all about people in their 60s who are on the cusp of retirement, or people in their 80s who are beginning to face physical and cognitive limitations. You could say we’re the Rodney Dangerfield Generation, since we don’t get any respect.

How do we account for this extraordinary level of happiness? The simple, unscientific answer is that we’re boomers. Our generation is known for its sense of optimism and willingness to explore new things. These are people who flocked to San Francisco for the Summer of Love and hitchhiked to Woodstock without much more than a few dimes in their pockets. Now we are hitting the road again to see and do things we’ve not done before. As one observer put it, the seeds of being boomers in their youth are now growing into a sense of tranquility that other generations can only aspire to gain.

I congratulate you if you are 70+ and reading these words. You’ve made it, found more happiness than most, and can just focus on enjoying the years ahead. For those not yet 70 –  the best is yet to come.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

Best of BoomSpeak

2006. Remember where you were or what you were doing? I had to stop and think about where I was living and working. Oh, right. I was the Creative Director at DesignConcept and had this idea that since everyone was blogging about something, it might be a good time to create a blog devoted to being a baby boomer. It had a funny name at first, but then we settled on BoomSpeak because that seemed to fit for a blog that would give boomers a voice and an opportunity to express their thoughts on growing up and aging as boomers. We thought it might make money by selling ads. Ha! Another fantasy crushed!

Thanks to longtime contributor Harpeth Rivers for suggesting that we put out a collection of the best of BoomSpeak. As I note in the subtitle, I think they are all great or I would not have put them in the blog in the first place. Thanks also go to all our faithful readers and contributors for sticking with us for the long haul, and to Jim Fanzone @ DesignConcept for the cover art.

It was surprising to scroll through our online archives and realize how many contributors we have had in sixteen years. We selected what we thought were the best posts and that was not easy — there were so many gems. You have our most sincere gratitude for selflessly allowing us to share your words and thoughts.

We hope you find this BoomSpeak anthology entertaining, and thanks again for coming and going along for the ride.

If you ever contributed a piece that we published, you might find it in this anthology. A sneaky way to get you to buy the paperback or Kindle version?? Yeah, so what? It would be the first time there was any monetary profit to putting out this ezine for 16 years.

Click here to order your edition, and thanks again for being part of the BoomSpeak experience. Much appreciated.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon. Best of BoomSpeak is now available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon.

Muscling In

We’re melting. Well not really melting, more like shrinking. No, shrinking isn’t the right term either. We have muscles, but they are slowly wilting.

Wilting is a better word. But the actual loss of muscle mass is a bit scary. Starting at age 40, 8 per cent of our muscle mass just disappears. If that wasn’t bad enough, the research indicates that we then continue to lose another 8 per cent each decade.

Stay with me now. That means you lose 16 per cent of muscle mass by age 60, 24 per cent by age 70, and 32 per cent by age 80. When I see these numbers, I start to imagine that we’re going to be just skin and bones in our 80s. Come to think of it, that’s what our parents did look like in their 80s.

Are we going to just take this lying down? Because we’re just too weak and lacking enough muscle to stand up? NO!

Okay, maybe. If we do nothing to change the course of this wilting muscle mass phenomenon, we will be limp noodles that can barely pick up a cup of java in the morning (a loss of unparalleled magnitude for many).

Or, and you know what’s coming, we pick up the free weights and start lifting. And the TV remote does not qualify as a free weight. We are talking about those little barbells that come in 4, 6, 8, 10, 12-pound varieties. You lift them up out to the side, over your head, and in any other approved motion. Some people even use water bottles if they don’t want to bother with the free weights. AARP has loads of info on strength training.

The objective is to keep the muscle mass you have, not to end up looking like Popeye. Not that the Popeye look would be so bad, it’s just over the top when you’re 80 years old.

Boomers are getting butt lifts, neck lifts, breast lifts, cheek lifts, hair plugs, and a raft of other procedures that are generally designed to tighten up their bodies. Spending all that money and time on these procedures without addressing diminished muscle mass means they could still end up being a bag of bones.

If you want to lift something for a better body, go out and get some free weights. Tell them Popeye sent you.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

You Can't Make Us

 

We’re not moving. Do we have to say it again? You can’t make us.

Two out of 3 adults aged 55 and older plan to stay in their current homes and age in place. Quite a departure from the retirees that preceded us. They largely downsized or moved into one of those “adult” communities.

It’s not helping the housing shortage either. Thanks to rising home values, many boomers can afford to stay right where they are.

It helps if you’re in a reasonably sized house all on one floor. Some boomers are going to being facing some substantial renovations if they hope to age in place. When AARP surveyed homeowners last year, 70% of them indicated they would need to modify their bathrooms to reduce shower steps and add grab bars. The same percentage indicated that their homes had other significant accessibility issues, both inside and out. Making those renovations could entail a substantial cost, but on the upside, it will make the house more valuable to the next batch of boomers when the time comes.

Hell, we’ve already replaced almost all the doorknobs with levers, so we must be halfway there. Now we just need to screw handrails to every doorway and hallway, and we will be set. Wait a second. We will need brighter lights too. Oh, yeah, and one of those smart thermostats so we don’t have to mess with little dials. And smart showers and smart doors and blinds. Check. And one of those bathtubs with a door on it. Check. Medication reminders. Check. Medical alert for fall detection. Check.

This is starting to add up to some serious spondulix! But that’s okay. Because remember we’re not moving. They can’t make us.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

8 Reasons Why

I tend to be wary of online articles that try to snag your eyeballs with such wonders as “10 Ways to Lose 25 Pounds” or “12 Neighborhoods In (insert your town here) Where You Have a Good Chance of Getting Mugged” or “5 Ways To Be a Better Lover.”

It’s not the topics per se – it’s the way they have quantified it that gives me pause. Ten ways to lose 25 pounds when 2 or 3 ways that really worked would be sufficient. But I digress. Often. Unrepentantly.

8 Reasons Baby Boomers Are Clogging Up Divorce Court.

There. That’s the one that stopped me short. The gist of the article is that when boomers hit certain milestones such as a parent passing away or turning 65 or some other life transition, it can trigger divorce action.

Here’s some reasons why. Life expectancy is increasing. Do you really want to spend another 25 years with him/her? Hmm, at least one of you is thinking. Hadn’t really thought about that one.

How about those boomers on their second marriage? Yeah, you. If the first marriage didn’t work out, there is a higher probability that the 2^nd might not either. The US Census Bureau keeps track of this sort of thing and they say 60 percent of second marriages and 73 percent of third marriages will end in divorce.

Let’s pick up the pace here. The kids are gone and on their own, I’m out of here! Heard that one? How about we’re set with our assets so let’s split them and then split. Or you’ve tried a half dozen communication strategies and none of them are working, otherwise known as falling out of love.

Some couples just don’t want the same lifestyle anymore and their values have changed. Why pretend that you agree? Adios.

Infidelity? There’s 2 kinds. One partner is cheating with a honey/sweetie on the side. Or one partner is cheating with the finances. Either way, one of you is unfaithful and that’s grounds for divorce.

Lastly, the relationship has become abusive, verbally, or physically. Sorry if you didn’t see that very big downer coming, but it is a real reason why many boomers end up in divorce court.

Now you can see why I tend to steer clear of articles that open with “8 Reasons Why…” You are better off reading the ones that promise to tell you the “50 Best Places in the U.S. To Retire.” It’s just their way of forcing you to look at 50 online ads for stuff you don’t want, but at least you won’t end up in divorce court.

Unless you can’t agree on the best city in which to retire.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is also available on Amazon.

Your Robotic Friends

I knew this day was coming. I joked about it years ago in a BoomSpeak post. Now it’s here. The robots have arrived in nursing homes. In Minnesota, 16 robots will soon be dispatched to 8 nursing homes around the state.

Before the pandemic, there wasn’t exactly a groundswell of interest. That was then. After 200,000 nursing home residents or workers died of the coronavirus, minds were changed. Three hundred nursing homes have closed. It’s harder and harder to hire caregivers to work in nursing homes. More than 400,000 workers at long-term care facilities have left the profession. People don’t want to work there and don’t want their elderly relatives to reside there.

Technology had already begun to fill the gap even before the pandemic arrived. Touchless meal delivery, video doctor consults, and home monitoring devices have grown in popularity. The next step is robots reminding us to take our meds, socialize with us, and pick us up when we fall. And don’t laugh –– smart toilets can monitor our meds and nutrition.

Japan is once again way ahead of us when it comes to the use of robots for assisted living environments. They had to be pioneers because they have the world’s oldest population and a limited labor pool.

While the robots will not replace human caregivers anytime soon, Covid-19 has opened our minds to the potential for robots to supplement the functions of human caregivers, and in some cases, perform these functions in a safer manner that prevents potentially deadly human contact.

I still have this image of a nursing home resident sitting in a robotic bathing conveyance that operates somewhat like an automatic brushless carwash. The suds come down and the gentle spray applies the water, then those floppy sponge things dance around a bit, followed by a gentle spray rinse, and then a warm blow dry. Pretty sweet when you think about it. Hardly any effort and you’re in and you’re out. Maybe not as personal as a human performing the service, but then again, maybe we’re not going to want personal bath services.

All I’m saying is that maybe Robby robot is about as personal as we’d like when it comes to some nursing home tasks.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

The 2030 Problem

Hey everyone – they have named a new problem exclusively for baby boomers!

Oh, the excitement.

Demographers have projected that there will be a major eldercare bomb arriving in 2030. What to do, what to do?

First off, society needs to acknowledge that in a repeat of the original boom, there will be another boom coming that will impact eldercare.

How does society prepare for this boom? For starters, we need a payment and insurance system that can handle eldercare better than what we have now, because the numbers are going to be staggering. Two, we need to be proactive in keeping aging boomers as active and healthy as possible. Three, make sure eldercare is more easily accessed. And four, the tough one. Try to change the way our culture views the elderly, so that aging boomers are integrated into community life.

Something sounds very familiar about this scenario. That’s right! It’s similar to climate change. We are getting the early warnings that a storm is coming (I refrained from the term shitstorm, but there it is), and the question as always is will we do anything about it and will we react in time. Short answers: nope and nope.

The penalty for not acting is what some might call dire. A reduced workforce on top of higher costs for eldercare could force the economy to take a major hit, or an economic shock. In many first world countries where national health insurance programs are already in place, the social safety net will most likely be able to absorb the added costs associated with the 2030 problem. Not so in the U.S. Long term care costs in the year 2000 were $120 billion. In 2030, that figure is projected to be $270 billion.

The only note of optimism here is that generally speaking, boomers are in better health now compared to their parents when they were the same age. So maybe the analysts have not factored that into their calculations. Maybe.

Back to what to do. Take care of yourself, exercise, eat well and buy long-term care insurance. And support efforts to make eldercare more accessible. We’re all going to need it.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. You can also visit his author page here. His newest mystery novel, Rio Puerco Demise is available on Amazon here. His first mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon.

Digital Natives Untie!

 

Yeah, I know. There’s a typo in the title. It’s an old cartoon joke. But digital natives really are united and that spells trouble for boomers.

Why trouble? Think about it. Who will be left knowing how to read a map? If Google Maps tells you turn by turn how to get someplace, a digital native will never know the joys (and frustrations) of reading a paper map. And figuring out how to fold the damn thing back up.

Who will be left knowing how to drive a stick shift? Not only drive one, but also know how to roll down a hill to jump start it when the battery is dead. See if a digital native can do that trick.

Ironing? Does anyone under 50 know how to use an iron to get the wrinkles out of a fine linen blouse? Hint: you need to own an iron and an ironing board. That’s why permanent press was invented. Besides, the wrinkled look is cool.

Writing a letter? Wouldn’t that be a shock if you received a letter written by a digital native. For one thing, they don’t really teach cursive writing, so if you did get a letter, it would be print lettering. Better yet, they would type it on their computer and then print it out and stick it in an envelope. Please DO NOT USE THE COMIC SANS FONT!

Spelling!! Don’t get us started. If you don’t know how to use a dictionary, I’m talking about a printed on paper bound book, then you might be a digital native that only knows how to ask Siri or Alexa how to spell a word. And texts? Who cares if some of the words don’t make sense. You get the general drift of what they are trying to tell you. Maybe.

If we thought spelling was a problem for digital natives, it pales when compared to what’s happened to proper grammar. I can imagine boomer professors laughing hysterically when they read college student essays and exams.

The good news for digital natives is that they can solve any problem with a computer or a smart phone. So why worry about any of these aforementioned arcane life skills?

Unless you can’t get WIFI.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

Round and Round

She doesn’t have much pick-up but she gets everyone where they need to go. Round and round she goes, from the portico out front of the hotel down to the strip and back. Between the two vans, there’s a shuttle coming through every eight minutes.

You would think that would be enough to satisfy most guests. You never have to wait more than eight minutes to get underway. But people on vacation don’t seem to know how to relax. They board the shuttle van and make nervous chitchat for a few minutes and then get borderline belligerent if we don’t get moving right away. In a hurry to get down to the casino and lose their money, their sense of time, and in some cases, their minds.

“Just waiting for a few more guests before we head out. Want to give everyone a chance to get down to the strip.” What I really wanted to say is “Pipe down, asshole. We’ll get there when we get there.”

But semi-retired geezers can’t afford to be rude to the tourists. In our laughable three hours of training, they stressed to us how the shuttle drivers are just as representative of the hotel as the desk clerk or the concierge. “You’re the face of the hotel as much as any other employee,” were the exact words. If that’s true, the hotel is looking mighty tired.

We don’t earn tips like the airport shuttle drivers often do when they assist passengers with luggage. Just our ten bucks an hour and no real bennies to speak of. The choice of hefting heavy luggage or just doing the driving was easy for me. Why throw your back out for a few dollars in tips. I’ll just be polite and helpful to the guests and take my check.

I do have a reoccurring fantasy while I’m driving. I just keep driving past the strip and none of the passengers say anything. Mile after mile out into the desert I drive until you can no longer see the tall buildings or the bright lights at night. Finally I stop along a stretch of highway that is completely desolate. I open the door. “Okay folks, this is your stop. Remember, the shuttle runs every thirty days, so be sure you come back to this stop when you’re ready to return. Good luck and I hope everyone’s a winner.”

It’s not much, but this fantasy can keep a man happy for hour after hour of going round and round, and that means a lot when you’re semi-retired.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

Giving them the business

Stop and think for a moment how many of your fellow baby boomers own their own businesses. They are designers, bakers, realtors, restauranteurs, farmers, nursery operators, landscapers, pet groomers, childcare operators, vintners, photographers, B&B owners, interior designers, and an almost endless list of various retail store operators.

Now stop and think for a moment about what happens to these businesses when the baby boomer retires. Is there a succession plan? Is there a family member in the wings ready to take over? Is there enough potential to offer the business for sale?

Starting to get the picture? Baby boomers account for about 40 percent of all small businesses. Now factor in the 10,000 boomers who are retiring EVERY DAY. There is about to be a seismic shift in the future of small business in this country.

Millennials and Gen Zers are skewing more to the tech sector when it comes to career choices, so what happens to these boomer businesses, which incidentally are profitable for the most part? We’re talking about 2.3 million businesses that employ around 25 million people. The supply of potential businesses is about to outstrip the demand for ownership.

There’s an unparalleled transfer of wealth happening now, as the boomer generation leaves its wealth in the form of inheritance. But what happens to the actual businesses that built that wealth? Boomers may wish to hand off the business to a family member, but if no one wants it, it either can be sold if there’s a buyer or it withers on the vine.

So what? So there may be fewer professionals, trades people and crafts people to cater to our needs. Fewer plumbers to fix your water heater, fewer unique restaurants that feature unique local entrepreneurs, and overall fewer options other than national chain stores and services. This may be one of those “you won’t know how much you miss us until we’re gone” situations. And there’s nothing on the horizon that would have the potential to change the trajectory of this trend.

The movement to support your local small business is more important than ever in our current economic climate. We just need to realize that many baby boomers will be the last small business owners, because operating a small business has gone out of style. RIP.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

Leggo Your Money

Everyone laughs when the conversation turns to money and someone says, “Well you can’t take it with you.”

Yeah, no kidding. There are no ATM’s in heaven or hell (if you believe in either).

But boomers have been encouraged for years now to SAVE, SAVE, SAVE. According to recent surveys, many boomers are not drawing down their assets. Quite the contrary, they continue to accumulate and grow their wealth.

What’s holding them back? High on the list is the fact that they can live off social security and other incomes sources without touching their savings. Don’t need to tap it so leave it alone. OK, so you don’t want to be extravagant but you “could live it up a little,” eh?

Why else would you hold back? Maybe you want to leave it behind for offspring. So that they can put it in the bank and not spend it either? Mmm? Better to give some of it away NOW to some of the charities and causes that you know can really use it.

Then there is the notion that you need to keep the nest egg for those “unforeseen costs.” Such as getting old and wearing out. That’s right, we’re all going to wind down and check out. You could just as easily therefore make the argument that you ought to enjoy your money while you can.

Probably the biggest worry of all for boomers is that they will run out of money. I get it. We’re living longer. Most of our parents enjoyed 10 or 15 years of retirement leisure and then it was lights out (sorry if that sounds a bit harsh, but that was life expectancy for their generation). We’re exercising and eating well so that we can enjoy 25 or 30 years of retirement. I’m not quite sure what we will do with all those extra years, but damn it, we’re going for it.

I’m not advocating profligacy necessarily but I hate to think we’re going to hold ourselves captive to the other “P” word – parsimony. Pinching pennies down to the finish line isn’t really living. It’s more like barely eking it out.

I’m not sure I really know what it means, but my mother (one of the all-time, unparalleled penny pinchers) once said what I think she meant as advice, “Ladies and gentlemen take my advice. Pull down your pants and slide on the ice.”

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

Fear Transfer

It used to be we were only afraid of Covid. Now, what we fear most is that we have lost these precious retirement years all together. Boomers who were already retired when the pandemic began or those that retired as a direct result of the pandemic, were equally affected. Longtime plans for travel and family activities were put on hold. Initially, it was just one year. Then the one year extended to a second year. And now? No one really knows what the risks are, even if one is vaccinated. Chances of dying are lower? Great! What a relief! Wait a second! That’s the best-case scenario? There’s a fairly good chance we won’t die? Gee, thanks.

Almost everyone is vaccinated (let’s not even talk about why it’s not 100%) and yet we still have trepidation about eating indoors or flying somewhere on an airplane. What have we really lost? Time. Just time. But, it’s time that could have been spent with friends and family. Time to visit new places and try new hobbies and activities. Time for an in-person book club. Time to meet new people. Time to find a new love in your life.

The next thing to fear, thanks very much pandemic, is that we will make ourselves sick or crazy trying to make up for lost time. In our zeal to get back that lost time, we try to redouble our efforts to do everything and go everywhere. Perfect. Then we get sick because we’re so tired from trying to do too much.

It does appear at this moment in time that baby boomers are planning to break the metaphoric shackles that have been trapping us in our homes and hit the road. Fearful or not, we are ready to escape into the wide world. Be warned. Boomers are loose and they mean to have a good time, so woe to anyone who stands in their way.

But we will be as polite about it as we can, you can be sure.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

What? No Toons?

George of the Jungle? The Jetsons? The Roadrunner? Huckleberry Hound? Tom and Jerry?

How can any self-respecting baby boomer forget all the hours we logged in front of the TV (mine was black and white) watching cartoons on Saturday morning?

No one was worried about where we were or what we were up to as long as they could here the TV was still turned on and we were laughing. Unsupervised time to ourselves to indulge our appetite for dogs that could talk and coyotes that could order explosives from the Acme Company. What could be better than that?

But first, we needed to slurp down sugar-filled cereal. Then we planted ourselves in front of the set and didn’t move for hours. Who knows what our parents were doing, but they were most likely relieved to have time to themselves and not worrying about what we were up to.

For me, a few hours of toons was followed by my favorite westerns. Wild Bill Hickok, Roy Rogers, Hopalong Cassidy, the Cisco Kid, and don’t forget Gabby Hayes.

The good news is that all that TV surfing was followed by outdoor play where we used our imagination (spurred of course by what we had just watched on TV) to invent our own play scenarios. Once again, no one worried about where we were or what we were doing. That is at least until someone went back into the house with a scraped knee or some other minor injury.

Sadly, for the generations that followed us, the Saturday morning fun ended when the networks realized they were not making much revenue from kids programming. They turned instead to sports and news while cartoons moved to after-school slots. G.I. Joe and Thundercats took over and they were really just half-hour advertisements for toys. On top of that, Congress decided to legislate more educational programming for kids. The ride was over,

But now kids can watch cartoons whenever they want via streaming services. And on their phones for crying out loud!! How can you miss the group watching experience if you’ve never experienced the pleasure to be had from that communal fun?

It’s some consolation that baby boomers can feed their nostalgic jonesing by going online where you can find just about every cartoon you ever watched as a kid (search YouTube for Looney Tunes and you’ll see what I mean).

Next thing you know, you’ll be Googling “penny candy.”

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.

You Know You're Old When...

 

Don’t know who came up with this list, so I just have to hope it’s in the public domain. It’s definitely in the funny domain.

1. When one door closes and another door opens, you are probably in prison.

2. To me, “drink responsibly” means don’t spill it.

3. Age 60 might be the new 40, but 9:00 pm is the new midnight.

4. It’s the start of a brand new day, and I’m off like a herd of turtles.

5. The older I get, the earlier it gets late.

6. When I say, “The other day,” I could be referring to any time between yesterday and 15 years ago.

7. I remember being able to get up without making sound effects.

8. I had my patience tested. I’m negative.

9. Remember, if you lose a sock in the dryer, it comes back as a Tupperware lid that doesn’t fit any of your containers.

10. If you’re sitting in public and a stranger takes the seat next to you, just stare straight ahead and say, “Did you bring the money?”

11. When you ask me what I am doing today, and I say “nothing,” it does not mean I am free. It means I am doing nothing.

12. I finally got eight hours of sleep. It took me three days, but whatever.

13. I run like the winded.

14. I hate when a couple argues in public, and I missed the beginning and don’t know whose side I’m on.

15. When someone asks what I did over the weekend, I squint and ask, “Why, what did you hear?”

16. When you do squats, are your knees supposed to sound like a goat chewing on an aluminum can stuffed with celery?

17. I don’t mean to interrupt people. I just randomly remember things and get really excited.

18. When I ask for directions, please don’t use words like “east.”

19. Don’t bother walking a mile in my shoes. That would be boring. Spend 30 seconds in my head. That’ll freak you right out.

20. Sometimes, someone unexpected comes into your life out of nowhere, makes your heart race, and changes you forever. We call those people cops.

21. My luck is like a bald guy who just won a comb.

Jay Harrison is a writer and creative consultant for DesignConcept. His mystery novel, Head Above Water, is available on Amazon and Kindle. You can also visit his author page here.